Tag: writing

I’m staring at a clean white page…

On By kepagewriterIn My Writing1 Comment

It’s not often I find myself staring at a blank page for very long. I can usually pull something from my head onto the page – even if it is something that I end up changing irrevocably or ditching all together. However, today I have been struggling. In fact, the day before as well. I was struggling to think of something to write about here, in my blog.

It is both funny and exciting that people read and seem to enjoy my blog. And unexpected. I had no idea how much fun it would be to write or how seriously I would start to take writing it.

When I first wrote, a mere two months ago, I had never even read a blog. I had no idea of the sheer amount of writing out there on the net. I read books, newspapers and used the Internet to buy stuff, find information but I didn’t look to it for anything else. I hadn’t really caught up with the rest of the world. I didn’t really want to.

How quickly things change. First of all, there is the sheer excitement that people are reading your words. It no longer feels like I am shouting in the dark. I can imagine an audience out there. Connections have been made. I didn’t realise, at first, how much it would feel like a conversation. Both when I am reading other people’s blogs and when they read and comment on my blog. I have learned things, felt supported and, perhaps most importantly, I have discovered other writers. It is good to realise that other people have felt the same way you do and are willing to share their experiences and help you along. I never imagined when I started this strange journey that one of the results would be the feeling of being part of such a warm community. It’s good to know you all.

So I can call myself a writer now….

On By kepagewriterIn Becoming a writier, Updates and information5 Comments

So it is out in the open now. I have written a novel and it is out on Amazon. A wider circle of people now know. I can safely say to be people that I am a writer. They can ask that question and I can say ‘Oh, a novel.’ Previously, I always avoided using the word writer. Even though every spare second was spent writing. Anyway, I had an real job. And that was what I gave as my occupation if anyone new asked. It would have been pretentious to use the word writer before this point. And a little embarrassing. I’m not sure why I thought that I needed the solid proof of being published but otherwise, I think, it would have seemed a little too much like intellectual masturbation.

I was always writing though. I think that as I have not previously mentioned it, people think Shattered Reflections appeared fully formed in the months since I have been unemployed. However, this is a work that has been years in the making. Writing sentences, paragraphs whenever I had the chance: on the train to and from work, when I had finished planning lessons, instead of reading in bed at night, while I ate my breakfast. Notebook upon notebook which then had to be typed up, checked and checked again. Without the last months of employment freedom, I would never have managed the final steps but the actual novel was virtually finished by then.

But now I am getting used to saying it. Although still with a small feeling of silliness. As if it is still not quite real. Perhaps because I am not making very much money from it at the minute which means I will have to get a ‘proper job’ when the money starts to get a bit low. And I’m getting used to the ‘oh I’ve always thought I would like to write a book but I wouldn’t know where to start.’ Well, you just start. For me, there was never any choice but to write. I’m not expecting to become a best-seller or make millions. (I mean, it would be nice, obviously but it is not my main motivation.) Regardless of how many copies I sell, how much people like it, I will always write because I have to and because I enjoy it.

Shattered Reflections: Now on Amazon

On By kepagewriterIn Updates and information2 Comments

At last. Shattered Reflections is on the shelves in Amazon (Is it still a bookshelf if the bookshop is virtual?) and will be available on Kindle in the next couple of days. It is both exciting and absolutely petrifying. I feel like it is the most amazing and the most stupid thing I have ever done. It’s like letting people into a corner of my mind – a pretty scary place at the best of times.

It is strange for other reasons as well. I will never have to edit or re-read this book. It is finally finished. Over. It is out of my hands. I will never have to think about the characters again and as I have grown quite attached to them over the years, this makes me a little sad. It feels like having a friend move to the other side of the world – I may have occasional contact with them but, in fact, they don’t belong to me any more.  I have to hope that people enjoy reading about them as much as I enjoyed writing about them.

Now I have to decide which of the myriad scribblings which are currently waiting patiently in the draw of my desk I should start work on now. A whole new set of characters to get to know and develop. Of course, there is the matter of promoting this book and I know that this will take up a lot of my time but that seems more like work. Starting a new writing project is definitely a pleasure.

Check out Shattered Reflections on Amazon here

Kindle is the future… apparently

On By kepagewriterIn Publishing1 Comment

Well, this is it, a sight not often seen. I am about to eat my words. It’s not often that you find me changing my mind about something. I’m nothing if not stubborn. In fact, bloody minded would probably be closer to the truth.

I’m going to blame my age for my resistance to all things new and technological. I was one of the last people of my friends to really take to using CDs, insisting on buying vinyl long past the point it was strictly necessary. You can still find me skulking around record fairs on occasion, coming out with bags full of delightful LPs. (The only difference being I now play them on a USB record player which means I can listen to them on my I-Pod. I’m not a complete Luddite.) And I do download music. It’s good because it means that I don’t need to leave the house or deal with other human beings, something I find less and less pleasant. (I blame my age for that as well.)

So, when  the Kindle first came out I was pretty vocal about the fact that I wouldn’t be getting on any time soon. Why anyone would want a cold, heartless machine in their hands when they could have a book that was resonant with the history of all the other hands that had held it and drank in its magic was beyond me. And to a certain extent, it still is. I love my bookshelves and I like to think that people get a fair impression of what I am like from them. No one is going to get that from looking at the screen of a kindle.

However, there are a few reasons for my change of heart. The first is, of course, the fact that my book will be published on kindle. I cannot be snobby about the very platform that has afforded me this chance to publish. Also, I have discovered the amount of people who are publishing in this way and am interested in seeing what sort of things are being published. I’d hate to think I was missing out

So, I have taken a deep breath, ordered a kindle from Amazon. In fact, I am actually quite excited about the idea of being able to have a book in front of me in minutes. And I will still buy books, I guess. After all, I still buy vinyl and CDs as well as downloading stuff. It’s not the end of the world for books just yet.

What next, that is the question…

On By kepagewriterIn Updates and informationLeave a comment

Okay, so I have finally finished proof reading Shattered Reflections and I am actually – against all the odds – still quite pleased with it. I think that I have solved all the issues that have been pointed out to me. The proof of that, I guess, will be what the wide world makes of it. A little bit scary that, but while I will continue to write even if no one buys this book, that is not the same as not wanting to be read. Everyone wants to be read. To me, that is more important than the amount of money I might make. Numbers of readers, that is my main concern. So I have to have faith in it. I have to hope that others will love the characters as much as I do, will think it relevant, touching, emotional.

The proofs have gone back and I am glad – while I obviously think Shattered Reflections is good – that I do not have to read it again. I will be happy to say it is finished and put all my notes and work away. It is tempting to keep tinkering but that is more to do with fear of actually putting the work out there than improving the book.

So the big question is what to write next and obviously I have ideas and I have been writing bits and pieces in the meantime. I try to write everyday, even if it is only a couple of hundred words. (The real world, where I have to go back to teaching in September, keeps intruding. How rude!) To that end, I decided to look through the draw where I have kept all my writing. Twenty odd years worth of writing as it turns out. Things that I had forgotten about. It is strange in some ways that Shattered Reflections should be the first thing to be taken to fruition. It certainly isn’t the first thing I’ve written. There are any number of projects here, some more complete than others. The question is whether it is a worthwhile exercise to actually look through it or whether it would just be a huge exercise in procrastination. I mean, could anything I thought when I was 25 still have relevance, still be worthwhile. Its hard to know.

Of course, there is also promotion and marketing to be done for Shattered Reflections when it is becomes available. And I am quite looking forward to the opportunity to work on my website and on learning about all the ways the Internet can help me. I am determined to be pro-active even though it is not really my nature. It has to be.

It is all excitement from here on in, then. For new projects and old. For the future. You’ll be hearing from me soon.

A strange exercise in self promotion.

On By kepagewriterIn Updates and information4 Comments

So it is a week since I started this strange exercise in self promotion and I have to say the net result is I am a bit rubbish at it. Others seem to excel at it. Easily sharing opinions, keeping the public aware of them. By contrast, I worry about every tweet, every word and letter until I lose momentum.

I posted my blog and people liked it. If I sound surprised then this is because I am. Perhaps you wonder why I wrote it if I didn’t expect this to be the outcome. Well, of course, I hoped. But in reality, the pessimist in me expected it to languish lonely in cyberspace. It’s strange to me that people I don’t know might randomly come across my blog and read it. Of course, this is the very definition of reading a book but walking into a book shop and plucking something off the shelf seems natural to me. It has taken me a while to realise that I could treat the Internet in the same way, that people treated it in this way. It makes me feel old to think that reading a book you have physically in your hand is becoming increasingly old-fashioned. Old, and a little depressed.

It has taken me a while to realise how the Internet works – I don’t mean the nuts and bolts of it, I don’t think I’ll ever understand that – but the way people treat it, think of it, work with it. I always vowed that I wouldn’t use Twitter or be the sort to post every thought on Facebook. And even now when I realise the usefulness of it, I still find myself hesitating. At heart I am a quiet person. (Okay, all those of you reading this who actually know me, you can stop laughing now.) What I mean is, I have never really put myself forward. It feels a little like volunteering information that no one asked for. So even as I am typing this it still feels strange.

As for the rest of my week, it has been spent in anticipation. The proofs of Shattered Reflections are ready and I am just waiting for them to arrive so I can start the project of editing them. Excitement bubbles under until they arrive.

Hello world!

On By kepagewriterIn Updates and information2 Comments

I have never been so nervous. This is the start of something new and I feel the usual amounts of trepidation that you feel when you put a new project into motion – will it work, will I be able to do it, will people care, read, be the least bit bothered about what I have to say. Not only that but I will be allowing people to read what I have written, something that I previously only allowed those the closest to me to do. If the people who might read my work were sat in front of me, armed with red pens in order to correct and change, I could not be more anxious.

I have been writing for years now. In fact, as long as I can remember I have tried to put stories together. It stresses me out when I cannot write and if I’m not actually writing, chances are I am thinking about what I could write. It seems about time to try and actually see if what I have written is good and to get myself some readers.

Having recently become unemployed, I decided that it was time to have another try at getting published. And this time I was determined not to lose heart, give up or become depressed by the rejection letters or – in some ways worse – good but we can’t guarantee a market so no type letters. Publishers are as cash-strapped as anyone at the minute so of course, it is not a good time to be trying to get started. Nevertheless, I was determined that this time something was going to happen.

Things have changed a lot since I last tried to get published about 10 or so years ago. My teaching career had taken off and teaching being what it is, I had little time for writing or to put in the hours it takes to find an agent or a publisher so it all went on the back burner. Now I’m back and there is a whole new way of doing things. I have to admit that I was a little bamboozled. Where to start, what to do first, I’m still not sure if I’m taking the right path. I’d welcome advice from anyone who has been down this road. I look at my computer and I sometime just want to scream “Help” at it. And of course, it just sits there smugly, unaffected by my panic.

Other days are more productive and I have found some sites (www.authonomy.com, for example) where I have posted my writing and where comments have been good and that has helped a lot. I’m learning how to share my work through facebook and twitter and try not to sit anxiously checking for notifications when I have done. Most excitely, I have decided to publish through Createspace and Amazon and am currently waiting for the proofs so I can check them. Excitement and anxiety fight with each other for supremacy on a daily basis but now I have started down the road there is no turning back. Which is good because I am nothing if not a coward.

So, I will be keeping everyone updated of my progress through this blog, both with Shattered Reflections and with new projects that I am working on.

Hello world!

On By kepagewriterIn Updates and informationLeave a comment

I have never been so nervous. This is the start of something new and I feel the usual amounts of trepidation that you feel when you put a new project into motion – will it work, will I be able to do it, will people care, read, be the least bit bothered about what I have to say. Not only that but I will be allowing people to read what I have written, something that I previously only allowed those the closest to me to do. If the people who might read my work were sat in front of me, armed with red pens in order to correct and change, I could not be more anxious.

I have been writing for years now. In fact, as long as I can remember I have tried to put stories together. It stresses me out when I cannot write and if I’m not actually writing, chances are I am thinking about what I could write. It seems about time to try and actually see if what I have written is good and to get myself some readers.

Having recently become unemployed, I decided that it was time to have another try at getting published. And this time I was determined not to lose heart, give up or become depressed by the rejection letters or – in some ways worse – good but we can’t guarantee a market so no type letters. Publishers are as cash-strapped as anyone at the minute so of course, it is not a good time to be trying to get started. Nevertheless, I was determined that this time something was going to happen.

Things have changed a lot since I last tried to get published about 10 or so years ago. My teaching career had taken off and teaching being what it is, I had little time for writing or to put in the hours it takes to find an agent or a publisher so it all went on the back burner. Now I’m back and there is a whole new way of doing things. I have to admit that I was a little bamboozled. Where to start, what to do first, I’m still not sure if I’m taking the right path. I’d welcome advice from anyone who has been down this road. I look at my computer and I sometime just want to scream “Help” at it. And of course, it just sits there smugly, unaffected by my panic.

Other days are more productive and I have found some sites (www.authonomy.com, for example) where I have posted my writing and where comments have been good and that has helped a lot. I’m learning how to share my work through facebook and twitter and try not to sit anxiously checking for notifications when I have done. Most excitely, I have decided to publish through Createspace and Amazon and am currently waiting for the proofs so I can check them. Excitement and anxiety fight with each other for supremacy on a daily basis but now I have started down the road there is no turning back. Which is good because I am nothing if not a coward.

So, I will be keeping everyone updated of my progress through this blog, both with Shattered Reflections and with new projects that I am working on.