I wasn’t really sure it could get any stranger. The whole process of publishing Shattered Reflections has seemed surreal. But now that it is out in the world, potentially being read right now, I have to admit that it feels a little bit weird.
Part of it is nerves, undoubtedly. Obviously there has been feedback, checking and what have you before but this is different. For a start, people will actually be paying for it. Previously, it didn’t seem quite real.
Everyone close to me has been superbly supportive. Immediately, people are buying the book, liking my facebook page and I am hugely grateful to them. But it does make me nervous, people I know reading it. It is rude in places, violent in others with a fair bit of bad language thrown in for good measure. I’m not sure I want people who know me to be able to see into the darker reaches of my mind.
My book. My novel. They are exciting words, good words. Not like the words what next. They are frightening, difficult words, no fun words. But they are the ones that I will be working on over the next few weeks.
Oh, how I remember having your exact feelings when my first novel was published. All I can tell you is that it gets easier to deal with each time around. My first novel had some disturbing scenes and was highly autobiographical in parts, but we write to be read. If you’re honest, your readers will respect you for it. If you fake it, they’ll know it. Sounds like you’re on the right path! Best of luck with your debut.
Thanks for your kind words and support. I’m sure it will get easier as I get used to the idea of actually having published something.