Tag: writing

Bad Habits Created by Bad Technology

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It finally happened. I had to admit, my computer was unusable. If it wasn’t folding in on itself due to having unexpected errors, it was not responding. I’m not sure what made me cling on to it for quite as long as I did. Money, partly but also the thought of having to choose a new machine. Anyway, the upshot is, I now have a marvellous mac mini and I can actually work again.

I hadn’t realised exactly how much I was affected by my computer’s bad behaviour. I find myself unable to concentrate for extended lengths of time as if I was writing then Word would inevitably not respond or it would close down unexpectedly and I would sit with the IPad and play The Sims while I waited for it to recover itself. Now I find myself wanting to break off after I’ve written a couple of paragraphs. I’m having to be really disciplined with myself or I wouldn’t get anything done.

Still, it does mean I’m catching up on some of the editing / re-writing I need to get through with Choose Yr Future. At least part of my reluctance to get on with this was the soul destroying nature of trying to battle with a PC that doesn’t want to co-operate. And hopefully that means beta-readers soon. And then publishing. I’m feeling excited again.

An excuse or an explanation: Why I’m finding it hard to get motivated.

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As a teacher, I often find  myself pondering the difference between an excuse and an explanation and usually I decide it is dependent on whether you are the one making the said excuse or not. That is you give your reasons for the lateness of your homework or whatever and they seem solid to you and you know that they happened therefore to you they seem like an explanation. To the person listening, they seem less reasonable. They are focused on whatever it is that you haven’t done and also do not know whether you are telling the truth so it becomes an excuse in their mind. The other thing is time. At first, it may be an explanation but when the work still doesn’t appear and more reasons are given, they quickly turn into excuses.

I feel a bit like this at the minute whenever someone asks me about the follow up to Shattered Reflections. I truly expected that I would have a finished product by now. And Choose Yr Future is close to being finished – at least to the point where I would have beta readers look at it. That is what is particularly annoying. This hasn’t been an easy year for me – my mother died in January – but I’m starting to feel frustrated with my lack of motivation. I can no longer accept my own explanations. I need to do something to get back into the writing frame of mind.

I sit down with good intentions. Today will be the day I get back on track. But then I stare at the screen or the page and nothing happens. I can’t concentrate. I’m too tired. I feel like it’s been a year of getting nothing done. No writing anyway.

It isn’t just emotional problems either. It’s the many jobs you don’t realise you will have to do. It’s the still running up to Newcastle all the time in order to sell her house, sort out furniture removals and countless other jobs that need doing. It’s feeling like you never have a moment to yourself. And when I do have the moments then I can’t be bothered to do much.

So it’s a new term and I’m in the process of sorting out new students to tutor so I should have a good idea of how much spare time I will have. I’m setting myself small goals, moving towards the bigger one of having a completed novel. And hopefully I will stop feeling like I’m making excuses to myself when I can’t get anything done. Wish me luck.

Plans for this year

On By kepagewriterIn Updates and information1 Comment

I’m bit late writing this. It is now beyond the middle of January and I still haven’t posted my new year resolutions / plans for the rest of the year. Perhaps one of them should be getting myself organised.

In terms of reading, I am doing two challenges this year:

  • The TBR challenge – I’m excited about this challenge for a nu2014tbrbuttonmber of reasons. First of all, it is always exciting to be forced to read books you’ve been meaning to read for ages. One of the books I am reading for this (Death Comes to the Archbishop) has been on my shelf for twenty years. This really is ridiculous. If not for this challenge then I probably would never have picked it up. It becomes far too easy to ignore these books in favour of new and more exciting books. The other reason that this challenge is good is that it does not involve my kindle. It is all books from my shelf. It doesn’t involve buying new books either. This can only be a good thing.
  • The Eclectic Reader Challenge 2014 – I’m looking forward to theclecticchallenge2014_300is challenge for different reasons. I really enjoyed the way it took me out of my reading rut. This year there are even more genres that I don’t usually read so that should be interesting.

In terms of writing, I have a few things I want to do.

  • In terms of reviewing, I am going to try to write a review for every book I read this year, regardless of whether it is for a challenge or not.
  • I have a few final tweaks to Choose Yr Future and then I will be looking for beta readers and hopefully be looking towards publication this year.
  • I am going to try and use writing prompts to write more short fiction and also make more efforts to get what I have written published / entered in more competitions.
  • Finish my current project which hasn’t got a name yet but is about 60000 words long.

So an exciting year hopefully. Certainly a busy one with lots of challenges and lots of fun and hard work ahead.

Projects, new and old.

On By kepagewriterIn My Writing, Updates and information2 Comments

I made the decision not to join NaNoWriMo because it didn’t really fit in with my schedule. I was editing at the start of the month and a new project didn’t seem feasible. Also, I thought that there was no way I’d manage the 50000 words. Editing Choose Yr Future was making me fed up and I thought I might have a break from writing when I’d got to a stage where I was happy to put Choose Yr Future to one side for a few months so that I can come back to it and be a bit objective.

Almost immediately I put it to one side, new ideas started to flow. I wrote a character description for one of the prompts for Chrys Fey’s 30 day writing challenge and then the words just wouldn’t stop. Now I have written 42000 words and wish I had focused myself a bit more to get to the 50000 deadline. Of course, this isn’t the finished thing, by any stretch. A good start has been made.

It hasn’t a name yet. That will come. Sometimes naturally. Choose Yr Future, I had to work at. I knew it had to be something to do with choice as that is an important theme. Long lists of possible names followed. At the minute, getting words on the page is much more pressing.

What I’m most impressed by is the fact I’ve written so much without really trying. I haven’t been able to sit for long hours although I have been grabbing whatever minutes I can to carry on.

Obviously this stage is much more fun than editing and I know that soon – probably at the turn of the year – I will have to return to Choose Yr Future and take it on to the next stage.

30 day writing challenge – Day 4 Create a character off the top of your head and write a short history about him/her.

On By kepagewriterIn 30 Day Book Challenge2 Comments

Day 4 of http://writewithfey.blogspot.co.uk/2013/07/chrys-feys-30-day-writing-challenge.html –  Create a character off the top of your head and write a short history about him/her. Looking at this, it is more like the opening scene including the character rather than a biography but here it is anyway.

Matt Murphy was assessing himself in the mirror. He was in a suit which was becoming less unusual but still seemed a little strange. He tugged briefly at his tie. it was his first proper day at Hilltop High  – yesterday had been teachers only – and he was trying to decide exactly which thing it was that the kids would find the most hilarious. He was tall – 6ft 1 – and extremely skinny so it could be that. Or his unruly hair. Or his tendency towards camp exaggeration. Or his broad scouse accent in the middle of South Yorkshire. Or…

He made himself stop. Probably it would be some, as yet, unrealised fault. He thought of the text that had just come and which had prompted the self-assessment. It was from Steph, a teacher already for some ten years. She had tried to talk him out of it. Do something better, she had said. He hadn’t listened. The text had said Good Luck in the lion’s den. Very fucking funny. 

He was thirty three years old. Too old to be starting a career. Not even a new career. The first one. Unless working in a pub counted as a career which he doubted. Maybe that would work in his favour. The fact that he looked older, was starting to go a little grey.

It had been a long road to here. If he failed at this, there was little chance of starting all over again. He wasn’t going to fail though, was he? He realised it would be difficult at first but he imagined that by the end of the term he’d be winning. If he could imagine it, it could happen. That was how it went, wasn’t it?

He didn’t particularly want to remember his own teenage years. He had left home before he was sixteen due to issues with his stepfather. School hadn’t been the easiest of places either. He had just stopped going. GCSEs seemed a minor thing to sacrifice when you were fighting for your life every day. The rest of that year had been spent on whichever floor would have him. He’d got a job at a bar and worked every shift he could. Eventually he had saved enough to get a flat. Then it had been night-school: GCSEs, A-Levels. Working every single second. He hadn’t imagined being a teacher. Just that he wouldn’t always be working in a bar, pulling pints for idiots. No way. 

That was when he had come to Sheffield. University had to be part-time so he could also work. English Literature. Not useful but enjoyable.Then an MA. Then teacher training. All the way up to this present moment.

He wanted it to be over. The first moment. It was like being at the bottom of a steep hill. he couldn’t see what the summit was like from this angle. He needed to be starting to climb. He picked up his briefcase and made for the door. He promptly fell over the corner of the bed. Silently he cursed his clumsiness. That was another possible source of amusement. 

“You look fine. You’ll be fine.” Matt turned towards the bed, towards the voice. He smiled. Mikey had never suffered a moment of nerves in his life. Matt supposed if he looked like that, he wouldn’t be nervous either. He was full of confidence on Matt’s behalf. He had no doubt that Matt would be fine. 

“I didn’t mean to wake you.” In fact, it had been his intention to sneak out quietly. He didn’t want to give Mikey the chance to make a fuss. He was nervous enough already. He didn’t think he could take any of Mikey’s pep-talks at this time in the morning. “I have to go.” He added, hurriedly giving Mikey a kiss on the cheek and then darting out of the door. Miraculously he didn’t collide with any more of the furniture.  

30 day writing challenge

On By kepagewriterIn 30 Day Writing Challenge, My Writing2 Comments

As I have definitely finished the Eclectic Reader Challenge and I am not about to try and read another twelve books in the next 3 months, I thought I’d try and find a new blogging challenge.
I really wanted it to be a writing challenge. I’m still in the throws of editing Choose Yr Future and so I am not writing much new stuff. I must admit that this is starting to get on my nerves. Not that I want to start a new big project until Choose Yr Future is in a better state but I did want to be writing something.

I started by following some of the challenges on Readwave which is a great site for sharing writing and reading great stories. The challenges are fun and short and encourage you to write in different styles. The most recent story How To Murder Your Partner and Get Away With It made the staff picks section so that was pleasing.

Then I happened upon the 30 day writing challenge on Chrys Fey’s excellent website and it seemed perfect. Small challenges that give me something specific to think about and help flex your writing muscles a bit.

Here is the list of the challenges. First one to follow in the next couple of days.

1. Start a piece with: “Once upon a time…”
2.  Open a book at random and pick a line. Use that line as the beginning of your piece and continue writing from where it leaves off. Pen the first thoughts that come to mind and don’t revise it.
3.  If you could go on a vacation anywhere in the world, where would you go? Use vivid details and prose to describe the experience you would like to have.
4.  Create a character off the top of your head and write a short history about him/her.
5.   Write about a dream or nightmare that you’ve had. Turn it into a short-short story.
6.   Start a piece with: “I am standing at my kitchen window…” (Be creative! Make the piece fit a specific genre such as mystery, horror, romance, etc.)
7.   What is your favorite season? Use vivid details and even include memories you have of that season.
8.   Pick the title of one of your favorite songs and write a piece about it. Give the lyrics meaning by creating a story for it.
9.  You’re sitting in a coffee shop when you look up and see _______. Write a fictional piece about what would happen if you saw a celebrity in a coffee shop. (Humorous/suspenseful)
10.  Find something that you wrote a long time ago (published or unpublished) and rewrite the beginning. Give it a different tone.
11.   Write a short nonfiction piece about your first job.
12. Turn someone you know and love into a character. Write about them. Give them a fictional life.
13.   Describe your dream home as if you are living in it now.
14.   Recreate the sentence: “It was a dark and stormy night.” Expand it into a paragraph or two if you are so moved.
15.   Write about a memory from your childhood. Good or bad. Give it new life and  insight.
16.   The next time you are eating, write about the food on your plate or in your bowl. Describe every  portion. And as you are eating, write about all the tastes on your tongue.
17.   What is your favorite holiday? Write a short-short about a character experiencing that holiday and everything you associate with it.
18.   Think of your favorite book growing up. Use the title as inspiration for your next piece. What do you imagine when you read that title? Write a poem or a paragraph.
19.   What were you like as a child? Describe little you as you would a character in a book.
20.   What is your sun sign? (Gemini, Virgo) Use your sign as inspiration for a character  (protagonist or antagonist) or setting (world or made-up town).
21.   Go outside. Sit on the porch, in the garden, or at the beach, and write about nature.
22.   Create a past life for yourself. Who were you? What did you do?
23.   Write a journal entry for your favorite fictional character.
24.   If you went on a road trip or cruise, describe the experience you would like to have and places you’d like to see.
25.   Theme: Water (Write anything that comes to mind involving water.)
26.   What do you imagine the future will be like? Write a short science fiction piece.
27.  What is your favorite fairy tale? Give it a new ending.
28.    What are you like now? Describe yourself as if you were a character in one of your books.
29.   End a piece with: “But that wasn’t the end.”
30.   Write a letter to your muse. (Dear Muse,)

 

Versatile Blogger Award – Thanks

On By kepagewriterIn Updates and information7 Comments

I have been away for a week or so in the internet free zone of my mother’s house. (At least I managed to get some writing done but all other tasks for the summer have so far been a non-starter.) When I returned I discovered that Sarah Evans at A Place that does not exist had nominated me for a versatile blogger award. It is lovely to think that my readers are inspired by my blog. In fact, I sometimes find it hard to believe that anyone is even interested in my ramblings. I’ve spent the last few days trying to decide on blogs to nominate myself as one of the things I have to do is nominate other blogs for the award. As well as add seven things about myself.

Ten blogs I’d like to nominate for this award. (I know I’m supposed  to do fifteen and I promise I will add the others but I’ve been having a lot of computer issues and I want to actually get this posted.)

1. A Fictional Existence

2. My novel opinion

3. My Little Heart Melodies

4. Xarglebooks

5. The Struggle to be a writer that writes

6. Book Snob

7. Book Journey

8. Doing Dewey

9. I like big books

10. Love at first book

I will contact each of them individually to let them know. Here are the rules for anyone who has been nominated:

1. imagesDisplay the Award Certificate on your blog.
2. Announce your win with a post. Make sure to post a link back to me as a ‘thank you’ for the nomination.
3. Present 15 awards to deserving bloggers.
4. Drop them a comment to tip them off after you have linked them in the post.
5. Post 7 interesting things about yourself.

Seven things about me:

1. I have written a lgbt novel called Shattered Reflections which was published last year. I’m rubbish at promoting it.

2. I love to write and will continue to do so regardless of how many I sell, how many readers I have etc. I’m currently working on two projects – Choose Yr Future and The Meaning of Sickness.

3. I read a lot and try to read as many different genres as I can. My favourite author is Margaret Atwood. I’m really looking forward to reading Maddaddam.

4. I get stupidly excited when our seasonal veg delivery comes.

5. I’ve stopped listening to what is in the charts and I no longer care that I do not know what the young folk are listening to.

6. I like it when it is really cold and the sky is blue better than when it is really hot and sunny. The sun gives me a headache.

7. I secretly watch Hollyoaks even though I would definitely look down on anyone else who watches it. I blame Emmett J Scanlan as I have a massive crush on him although he has now left and I am still watching it.

Thanks again to all my readers and I will endeavour to try and keep the blog as interesting as I can.

Plans for Summer

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It feels like this summer has been a long time coming. Now it’s here, I feel the usual panic at spending my time wisely. It is tempting to just lounge about and recover from the last term but before you know it, the weeks have been wasted and it is time to  go back to school.

This year, I have a lot of plans. First of all, I’d like to get Choose Yr Future into some sort of first draft. At least, it all needs to be written, even if I am still playing with the structure. (The structure is giving me particular trouble and I have already changed my mind twice about this.) Then will come editing and beta readers but I envisage that will be nearer the end of the year.

An even bigger task is to try and move away from teaching. Even supply teaching takes up too much free time, especially if you get a long term contract which happened to me in the last term. And even if the planning is less, it is still exhausting. And stressful, let’s not forget that. So, a change is required. 

It’s hard to know what else I could do. I’m sure I have transferable skills but the main problem isn’t knowing what they are but what I might want to transfer them to. Of course, there are opportunities to work online and I am investigating those. 

First up though, a much needed few days away. A chance to clear my head. Hopefully I will come back full of energy (which is sadly lacking at the moment) and with a fresh sense of focus. 

 

Anger is an Energy

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I’ve been thinking a lot about anger since I finished I Can Make You Hate by Charlie Brooker. Specifically my own anger. I do believe that if you are intelligent, you should be angry. At the state of the world today. So many things make me angry that if I started to list them, this post would go on for days.

I have also been thinking about how this fuels my writing. Or at least, it is fuelling what I am writing now. That is the advantage of writing speculative fiction. I can take my annoyances and take them to the logical extreme. The only problem is where to stop. At the minute, I have more ideas than I could possibly use. Which is good I suppose, as it could mean a series rather than just one book or maybe a different book set in a different future.

The main thing that is making me angry at the moment is education and this is definitely going to be included in Choose Yr Future. It was with a sense of dismay that I listened to the news that children could be ranked at age eleven. Apparently this will raise standards. All I can see that it will do is pressurize children and make some of them give up at the tender age of eleven. And of course, inevitably, the posher schools will come out of this at the top of the pile.

It seems to me that children – particularly working class children – are being failed by our current system with its emphasis on exams and testing. All they learn is how to pass tests.  Often you don’t remember what you have learned for a test afterwards as the test was the point, not the learning. The creation of academies, the ridiculous standards that Ofsted uses to judge teachers and schools, the lack of money and Gove’s depressing new curriculum, all of these things are destroying the education system in this country.

In my future, there will be a huge gap between the richest and poorest schools with only those who able to afford it progressing through the system to university. (With the huge amounts needed to pay tuition fees, I can see a return to further education for the rich only. I’m not sure I’d have made it to university under current conditions.) The result of this will be the poorer schools having less money, less equipment, only the newest teachers and therefore, a poorer education. The result of this would be that pupils from these schools would only have the opportunity for jobs such as working in a shop, serving the rich families, clearing rubbish, jobs that other people do not want to do. They wouldn’t be educated for as long because why bother. Jobs that require further education would only be available for the rich with their better schools and more experienced teachers. It wouldn’t take long for this self-fulfilling prophecy to take hold. You don’t have to spend all that long telling people they are worthless before they start to believe it. It would be a return to a nineteenth century style of education. Before the idea of education for all. I do not think it is melodramatic to suggest that it is in this direction that the current education system is heading.

 

 

It’s been a dry month

On By kepagewriterIn My WritingLeave a comment

June has not been a fun month. And I feel as though I have got nothing done. Of course, this is nowhere near the truth. I have done an awful lot. Those exam papers didn’t mark themselves. What I mean is, I’ve done very little writing and even less promotion.

I have managed to write one more chapter of Choose Yr Future. But it was in between marking or when I was tired and if truth be told, it probably isn’t very good. I also have a lot of notes written down hastily when an idea would strike (why is that never when you are sat at your computer trying to write?) which hopefully will still make sense when I get round to fleshing them out.

I have done very little online. The most obvious victim of this was my blog. It had been very much neglected, poor thing. Sometimes I wish I was in more of a routine with blogging, y’know writing a blog every Tuesday, Thursday and Sunday, or whatever. But the nature of my day job makes that sort of routine very difficult to keep to.

However, I have now got some more time – hence the three blogs in a week catch up – and soon I will be on school holidays with whole weeks worth of free time to use up on promotion and writing. Hopefully, I will have a first draft by the end of it.